The affair shattered everything. Trust. Safety. Your sense of reality. Maybe you’re the one who was betrayed, reeling from the discovery and wondering if you can ever believe them again. Maybe you’re the one who crossed the line, drowning in guilt and desperate to fix what you broke. Or maybe you’re both somewhere in between—hurt, angry, confused, and unsure if your relationship can survive this.
Infidelity doesn’t automatically mean your relationship is over. But rebuilding after betrayal is some of the hardest work you’ll ever do.
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 20 years of experience, I’ve walked alongside hundreds of couples through the aftermath of affairs—emotional and physical, one-time mistakes and ongoing betrayals, discovered and disclosed. Some relationships heal and become stronger. Others end with clarity and compassion. Both outcomes are valid.
You can't stop imagining them with the other person. Every detail feels like a knife. Sleep is impossible. Focus is impossible. The images won't stop.
One moment you're screaming. The next you're sobbing. Then you feel nothing at all. The emotional whiplash is exhausting.
They say it's over, but how do you know? You checked their phone, their email, their location. You're exhausted from surveillance, but you can't stop.
You're the one who had the affair. You hate yourself for it. You'd do anything to take it back, but you can't. And now your partner looks at you like a stranger.
If they could lie about this, what else was a lie? Was any of it real? Do you even know who they are?
Friends say "once a cheater, always a cheater" or "you should've left by now." But it's not that simple. You're not ready to decide yet.
Yes, and we’ll do it together.
Infidelity therapy is different from regular couples therapy. The stakes are higher, the emotions are rawer, and the path forward is uncertain.
Session 1-3: Crisis Stabilization & Disclosure
We establish immediate safety: Do you stay together or separate temporarily? Are there more secrets to disclose? (Full disclosure happens early, no more “trickle truth.”) We assess whether you’re both willing to do this work. If not, we pivot to separation support.
Session 4-8: Processing the Trauma & Understanding What Happened
For the betrayed partner: We process the trauma. Flashbacks, rage, devastation, all normal. For the unfaithful partner: We explore what led to the affair (not to justify it, but to understand it). For both: We map what broke in the relationship BEFORE the affair.
Session 9-20: Rebuilding Trust or Preparing to Separate
If you’re staying: We work on rebuilding trust, transparency, and intimacy. The unfaithful partner demonstrates trustworthiness through consistent action, not just words. The betrayed partner learns to trust again, slowly. If you’re leaving: We help you separate with clarity, not just reactivity.
Session 20+: Integration & New Relationship (If Staying)
Rebuilding takes 1-2 years. As trust stabilizes, we shift focus to creating a NEW relationship, not going back to “before,” but building something different. Hopefully stronger.
You don’t have to know whether you’re staying or leaving. We create space for you to gain clarity before making a decision you might regret.
Infidelity creates trauma. Flashbacks, hypervigilance, rage, numbness, these aren’t overreactions. They’re normal trauma responses. I treat them as such.
No minimizing. No “but you didn’t meet my needs.” The unfaithful partner must take FULL responsibility. That’s non-negotiable.
As soon as possible. The first few weeks are the most chaotic and painful. Therapy provides structure, safety, and support during the crisis.
That’s okay. You don’t have to decide right away. Part of therapy is creating space for you to gain clarity before making a decision.
Therapy can’t work if the unfaithful partner won’t take accountability. If they minimize, justify, or blame you, rebuilding trust is impossible. We address this directly.
That’s normal in the early stages. Transparency is part of rebuilding trust. But eventually, we work toward trust that doesn’t require constant surveillance.
Realistically? 1-2 years. Not 6 months. Not a year. Deep trust takes time. Anyone who promises faster is lying to you.
Emotional affairs are still betrayals. The lack of physical contact doesn’t make it less painful. We treat emotional affairs with the same seriousness as physical ones.
Multiple affairs suggest deeper patterns (entitlement, addiction, avoidance). We address those patterns, but rebuilding trust is significantly harder.
Absolutely. Individual therapy can help you understand WHY you made this choice, take accountability, and avoid making the same mistake in future relationships.
in-person and online options throughout Illinois.
Friday 10 AM – 8 PM
Saturday 9 AM – 3 PM
1525 East 53rd Street
Suite 433
Chicago, IL 60615
Parking: Paid parking available behind Akira and paid street parking.
Public Transit: CTA and Metra
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday
11 AM – 8 PM
125 South Wacker Drive
Suite 308
Chicago, IL 60606
Parking: Paid street parking or multiple public garages..
Public Transit: CTA & Metra.
Whether you’re navigating relationship struggles, identity questions, trauma recovery, or generational patterns you’re ready to break, I’m here to help. Fill out the form, and I will reach out to you as soon as I can.
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